Brave Benny Delays

Brave Benny Delays

I feel as if I am "making excuses" or "complaining," but it is true!  :-(  I haven't worked on my Brave Benny's Animal Alphabet book for a long time.  No wait, that's not exactly true--I haven't succeeded in doing any VISIBLE work on BBAA!  :-(

The other day, maybe three days ago now, I spent an hour and a half, maybe two hours, working on a layout sheet for the book, and I was within a hair's breadth of being finished with it, and the computer crashed and the file completely--and all my work--was gone, and since that time, I have not had time to sit and work again.  

Yesterday, ML came to dinner.  I spent the day racing around cleaning, shopping cooking, making desserts etc.  I didn't get any personal work done, except after dinner, during conversation, the paper testing. And so on--I won't go into it all, but something has happened every single day.  Belle Isle, Cranbrook, Graham's piano Lesson this morning.  AK!

complaints and resistance

1)I'm tired of complaining, but I always feel tired and cranky and can't seem to stop complaining.  :-(

2)When I really want to do something, or think I do, and make a commitment to it, I thin no longer want to do it, or part of me doesn't or is resistant or drags its feet.  :-( :-( :-(

--

I didn't trust it for a moment
but I drank it anyway,
the wine of my own poetry.
 
It gave me the daring to take hold
of the darkness and tear it down
and cut it into little pieces.
 
-- Lala, 14th century Persian poet

Mary