Imsomnia 070814-15

Insomnia 070814-15 (click image to view larger)

When I picture my days and nights, I imagine working hard, accomplishing great things, loving, traveling, writing gardening, doing art, walking running biking visiting and then sleeping the sleep of the justly tired, peaceful happy sleep. I do not imagine sitting all night (literally) in a stupor, too agitated to sleep and too tired to accomplish anything meaningful, and laying about exhausted and sick during the day. Not do I imagine wasting time sitting on the toilet unable to pass anything but having to try and try because I uncomfortable with needing to go. The day dribbles away, wasted by long phone calls from distant relatives, nurses, people wanting to set up appointments. I’m so far behind on things that need attention that I fee like someone treading water and becoming too exhausted and chilled to keep my head up and sinking slowly deeper. The best (and worst) laid plans of mice and men gwyn aft awry or gwyn aft entirely.