I walk 45 minutes a day because of my fibromyalgia—it helps ameliorate the symptoms somewhat. Sometimes it’s hard. Sometimes very hard. Sometimes impossible. Then I walk less. Or, worse yet, not at all, which starts a downward spiral.
Last night, we divided the duties. Keith often walks with me, but he went grocery and gift shopping while I walked and wrapped. The gifts I had ordered for him were out of stock and I had nothing at all for him. Zilch! I also had nothing for my Mom. It was raining. I put on my raincoat, hat and backpack and walked to the Village Market where I got candy for my mother—just a small little bag of it. (I’d like to get my Mom a blouse or a sweatsuit. I finally decided that that would be the best thing. New clothes are something she still gets pleasure from and something she can use. But time is running out. And I have to have something.) I also got candy for Keith. At least he’ll have something to open.
Then I walked a couple blocks down Mack to Mr. C’s where I got some whiskey for Keith. He’s been asking for it. I’d rather not buy him whiskey, but since my other gifts fell through, I figured I’d better have something on hand to put under the tree. I also got a small gift for Erwin. The things I got were heavy and really weighed down my backpack so it hung hard on my shoulders. I felt as if it would sever the arms from the neck. But I kept walking.
I still had a half hour to walk and it was dark and rainy and lonely. My fibro flared, my shoulders hurt (a lot!), but I just kept trudging. More and more slowly. I wanted to hurry, but I couldn’t because I was too stiff and sore. I was sad—to be in pain—but happy, because now I at least had a little something for everyone on my list—no one at least in my immediate family will be empty-handed. Phew! Relief and pleasure, happiness and joy. YAY! And I did it all on foot, even with my fibro! (Boy, there’s a lot of stress connected with Christmas! Glad to release a little of it! Yippee! Earlier, Keith and I had gone out to Connie’s and finally gotten some of the things we’d searched and searched for the day before without any luck. They were gifts for granddaughter Rachel. YAY! All in all a much more successful day.)
I wanted to hurry because I wanted to beat Keith home (he was out in the car.) I didn’t want him to see me carrying the heavy, heavy bag and suspect me of walking to Mr. C’s and getting him whiskey. I wanted it to be a surprise. And I did beat him home. I left the whisky in the backpack in its normal place (where he was unlikely to notice or think anything of it) and now that he is at work, I’m going to go down and get it and wrap it and hide it. (However, he saw the gift I got Erwin, so he may suspect me of having gone to Mr. C’s anyway, DUH, I should have hidden that, too!)
I still have cards to make—Christmas cards to mail and gift cards if I don’t run out of time and a sweatsuit to buy for my Mom and gifts to wrap but I feel a lot better.