Saturday, December 02, 2006

Not any port in a storm

I'm so glad to be HOME, and glad that THIS house and this family feels good to me, feels more and more like home. The Kimbrook house no longer feels like home, and that feels sad. Happy and sad and all mixed up. Happy and hopeful for Erin, but a sense of bereavement for me. But this sadness is balanced by a growing sense of love and belonging for this house and home and family! I'm not settled here yet, by any means, lots of boxes still to unpack. But I'm here, I'm home and I'm happy to be here.

I miss my friends and family in NY, AND I love my new friends and new family. It's confusing and difficult sometimes. I wish I didn't have to leave loved ones behind. At the same time, my new life feels more and more happy and settled.

I've just returned from a long grueling drive, from a brief time in NY, too short a visit for the amount of driving involved. Tonight is Dale's birthday and then Graham's piano recital. Sometimes I wish I could be in two places at once. And I'm happy happy happy to be here.

(The picture is the lighthouse at Mackinac Island--representing any port in a storm. (NOT!)) Posted by Picasa


Sara said...

Glad you made it home safely. We were out on Erie running errands yesterday afternoon when the rains hit. It was torrential. The entire south lane of Erie was flooded, and we had to do u-turns twice on the way home because the roads were completely flooded and blocked off by law enforcement. I don't know how they get set up so fast, but I'm sure glad they kept me from flooding my engine.

I think there is always a little sadness associated with any big move (or other big change). I love my house, but there are many things I miss about the old apartment--I truly loved living there. It will get easier.

Mary Stebbins Taitt said...

It has been getting easier, thank Goodness! It was very hard at first. Yes, there are always tradeoffs with every change. I think these are clearly worth it.

Erin said...

Plus, think how happy Mark and I will be when we move and finally have our own space. We will finally have a "home" for the first time in many, many years. Then everyone will have somewhere they feel at home.

I was there painting yesterday afternoon when the rains hit. I could barely see two houses away.

Mary Stebbins Taitt said...

Yes, I do want you and Mark to be happy! I do--I mentioned that, happy and hopeful for Erin (And Mark!).

Right now, sitting here with Keith in the study, him reading the Sunday NY Times and me reading my email etc, I feel very happy and contented and wish the same for you, y'all!

It's been snowing here all morning. Lightly. The squirrel has been eating seeds out of our pupkins and we've been taking pictures. Tried running the vaccuum cleaner on the window to clear the fog but that scared the squirrel!


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